- week and Milestone

288.0

I am very excited about this weeks weigh in.  It means that I have lost 60 pounds!  It have been close for a couple of weeks but now it is official (until TOM next week).   Thanks for all the great comments on my 6 month post it made me cry a bit and let me know how much support I have. 

Water-  Still rocking it.

Exercises- 2 times but I am doing yard work all day saturday so that will count as a third.  I am still pushing myself  on trying to move faster because it helps me feel free for just a moment until my knees and body yell at me to slow down.

Mental- Easter candy was rough.  The kids had to keep it in ziplock bags (makes me feel guilty if I eat their candy) and I kept a little for me.  I was amazed at how only one piece would fix the craving when before I would eat several pieces without even thinking or waiting for the craving.

NSV- my sister posted pics on FB of me at easter and one of them was me helping my son look for an egg and it was a shot of me from behind.  I looked at the pic for a moment trying to decide who it was before I realized that it was me.  I normally un tag myself in FB pics but I didn't feel the need to this time.  I was ok with how I looked. 

I will post some what 60 lbs looks like pics on monday. 

~fat girl.

6 months as a Banded Woman

I was at the store shopping with my family on Saturday and someone said the date and I realized that it was my 6 month bandiversary!  I am now free to have carbonated beverages and that, my friends, means a lot.  I love caffeine free diet coke.  I know that I can't have much of it and to watch it but it is still great to know that if I want one I can have it. 

I also realized that the band is really working.  I have lost almost 30 lbs since the surgery and a total of almost 60lbs and I don't feel like I am missing out on the wonders of the world.  I think that I am finally learning that I am beautiful on the outside and that at the age of 30 I can be born into a new life and lifestyle.  If you had asked me 8 months ago before I started this journey if I would ever be below 300 again I would have made some sort of fat girls are sexy joke and cried on the inside.  I now feel confident that I can keep losing and one day be a normal size.  I am still a long ways of but that is how the turtle won his race, slow and steady.  This is a prize that is worth waiting for.

On the NSV side of things I had a few this weekend.  I went to see the princess on ice show with the kids and the arena is at the top of a steep incline and then the steps to the seats but I got to the seat before I even realized what I had done.  Last year when we went I almost died.  I stopped for breaks and just was in pain but it didn't even phase me.  Then I sat down.  I had been dreading this all week.  I have very large hips even for a fat girl and I am used to sliding into seat like a drawer in order to fit and then having to sit just right so that it doesn't hurt.  Well, I sat down and had about an inch on either side of my hips from the arms of the seat.  I was able to turn around while seated and was comfortable during the whole show.  It was very hard not to cry a bit from the joy in my heart.  I can now sit in theater seating.

I look back on these 6 months and no I did not lose as much as I thought I did but I am learning that we are all different and that is fine with me.  I am now looking into the next 6 months and wondering what new adventures my band will give me.  I have run, I have new clothes and a new life but I know that there is still so much more for me.   Thanks again to all of you for reading the thoughts, whines, gripes, and cheers from this fat girl and please continue to support me on this journey.  I truly cannot do this on my own and you guys and my family give me the support and boost that is needed. 

- week

290.4

What a crazy week!  We had 3 nights of tornado sirens, one night of zero electricity, baseball, gymnastics, egg hunts and life.  I am tired and worn out and feeling all of my 30 years.  I am less a pound this week and sneaking up on the 60 lbs loss mark.  I am scheduling a fill for may because I noticed this week that I am no longer as restricted as I need to be.   Hopefully, the next few weeks will pass quickly and I will get the perfect fill.   I have still been reading all of your blogs but have been really busy and only commented on a few.  I am hoping that this week will be slower and I will be able to get back into things. 

Week in Review:

Water-  Still rocking this and I think that I can officially say that it is now a done deal.

Food- Well, it was the week of Easter so I have had some candy but not much.  It is also weird that I am now craving savory things more than sweet. I am eating a little more than I should (notice bit about fill) but I am still only eating around 1.5-2 cups of food per meal. 

Exercises- Only twice this week.  I wonder if you can count rounding up kids and putting them in the hallway 3 nights this week or maybe even the rushing from one thing to the next.  Sigh, if only it worked that way.

Mental- I made Easter dinner this week for my family and while I was looking at the table something surprised me.  Usually it is potatoes, meat, breads...well, you get the point, and we still had that too but I also had salad, carrots and fruit salad for dessert.  We had other desserts too but it was interesting to me that in a year I now cook differently and include healthy options on our holiday menu.  This might sound odd to some of you but anyone from the south knows exactly what I am talking about.

How about all of you?  Did you have a great week?

~fat girl

- week

292.2

2 pounds in one week!  I am very excited but confused by this.  It seems that when I watch everything and workout right I don't lose but when I let it go just a little I start to lose.  I just can't figure this out.  Anyways, I am very close to 60lbs now (3lbs)  and I hope it is off by my birthday in a few weeks.

Week in evaluation:

Water- it is a little odd but I am actually drinking the water straight now with out the flavoring.  I don't know if I have just gotten used to it or if it is because it is warmer outside but I like it!  I am still rocking the water intake.

Exercise- *sigh*  only two times so far this week.  I know, but I did have a weird week.  I will hope back on the trail this weekend.

Food-  A little mental issues but not that bad.  I have also managed to make a bag of Lindt truffles last over two weeks (and still have some in there too).  6 months ago those suckers would not have made it past the night.  Just sayin.

Me- I have been really in a funk this week and I don't know what is up but I did not turn to food to make it better.  I am starting to feel better and am amazed at how different I am on the outside and inside.  Mentally I am doing well.

Product (Tool) of the week- Blogs

The product of the week for this week should have been the first one I ever did but it is the blog world.  I don't know if it counts as a product but it has been the best tool (short of my band) in this whole journey.  I have been able to be as open and free with my thoughts, emotions and struggles without feeling like I was exposing myself.  I have also been able to glean information for others and since I am a Mexico Bandster I am also able to feel like I belong to a support group.  (mexico bandsters are not really accepted in most real places)  I have found that there are so many people out there that are fighting with weight loss either with the band or with traditional methods.  I don't feel so alone anymore and I am so blessed that I have this tool to keep me motivated and firm on my journey. 

I also want to thank my followers and comments because you really do keep me accountable for what I put in my mouth and my workouts.  I missed my workout last night and I kept thinking about how I was going to have to post in my week evaluation that I didn't do it.  I still didn't do it but I am not missing tonight because then I would look like a princess Lame-o  for missing two nights in a row.  Thanks again for your support and if you have a blog and I am not following you please post the link in the comments.

+ week

294.0

I know this is not friday but I did weigh and was not surprised that I gained a little.  Not even a pound but I still have to mark it as a gain week.  I look back and a year ago I was gaining 10lbs with my period and spending the rest of the month working that off so I would say this is not a bad gain.  Hopefully by this friday I will be back at 293 or lower.  Please, let it be lower!!!!!!!  I didn't want to miss posting my weigh in but you guys know how life gets in the way sometimes.  I have just been really busy this past weekend but I knew I needed to post just to keep myself accountable.  Bow for my evaluation.

Week in evaluation:

Water:  I have worked it out.  Dividing my water into times has been a huge help.  I am drinking my water everyday and even more on some days.  I hope I continue to keep this up.

Exercise:  I worked out 4 times last week and I really do enjoy the after glow of the work outs.  Notice I did not say the workout itself.  I have started the weights back up and that could be the pound gained as well since muscles gained equal scale increase.  The bonus though is that muscle helps with the metabolism so I will take any increase in scale if it is muscle.

Mind:  I am still dealing with mental hunger.  In fact on wed night I ate past the point of being over full just because it was in front of me.  I was so uncomfortable for the rest of the night but it helped me decide that it was not worth it.  It is just amazing that after 6 months of eating differently I can still get a sneak attack from my brain.  So crazy.

Other:  Well I had my TOM this week and I did well with continuing to workout even with the cramps and I even did ok with the cravings.  I did notice that I was a bit crabbier than normal and I think that might be because I no longer get brownies from my husband to calm the beast that is in my mind.  Speaking of Mr. Fat Girl, he is still continuing to be what keeps me going.  He works out with me, he helps me find things to eat that aren't bad and he listens to me whine and complain.  He even goes so far as to tell me that when I work out it gets him worked up too (TMI, I know) but it does help a sweaty fat girl like me feel like the skinny girl in the gym when she has a hot man drooling after her. 

I hope you all had a negative gain week!

Workout Wednesday

Well, I normally do a product review on wednesday but I think I am going to hope on the band wagon (get it?  Band! yeah, I am a dork.)  I am going to use Wednesdays to post about my weekly workouts.  Here goes this week.

On Monday, Wednesday and Friday I do cardio.  This is my least favorite thing to do and even more so if it is on a stupid machine.  Lucky for me that it is nice outside so on Monday and Friday I can go outside to run like a hamster.  As I have posted before I have started alternating running and walking for my cardio.  My husband timed my running for me and I am now up to 30 seconds of running at a time.  I know this is not a long time but if you were close to 300 lbs would you be able to run for more than 30 seconds starting out?  I do this 30 seconds of running and 2 walking for about 20-30 minutes and then go home.  I am hoping to up it by 5 or 10 seconds each week until I get better and can up it by minutes.  Right now I am still focusing on correct form and breathing as well as trying not to hear my rolls slapping with each step.  My family is great at helping me on these workouts and I am glad that they are there.  I don't think I will ever be a "runner" but I do really enjoy it right now.  It is so much better than a machine too.  BTW, I am an accident prone person and this monday during my run I went right off the side of the trail and fell.  Yup, right on down went the big girl.  That cut the workout in half since it hurt my ankle and my husband is over protective.  My knee got scratched a little too and it makes me feel like I am earning battle scars from my workouts.  I laughed so hard at myself!  Here is a pic of it today (mostly gone) as an after workout pic.

On Tuesday and Thursdays I do weight training with low weight and high reps with little rest between the different movements.  I love this the most.  I really enjoy feeling like wonder woman and the way that it is done my heart rate stays up too.  One day I will have arms that are firm but for now they still wave hello and good by to me with each press up.  Here is My after workout glow pic.  Also, I put off folding laundry last night until after my workout (so that I would actually do it) so if you can see it in the pic don't judge!) 

OH, and that dumbbell is not that heavy.  It is an adjustable weight so it has slots for the other weights.  When I saw that pic though it looked like I was lifting like 100lbs!  Happy workouts to you all!

Food for thought

So, I received an email from my fill center that talked about stress and what it does to weight loss.  This made me laugh because of how coincidental it was with my mood today.  I am so close to starting my cycle that it is insane, I have not been sleeping well and we have been having some family drama in the extended wings of the family.  I noticed this weekend that I was snacking a little more and just tossed it off as PMS eating but does that make it ok?  I am all for having treats and not having a diet but a lifestyle of eating but I still find myself sneaking back into old habits.  Now, I say sneaking because it is not like I wake up and go "self, I want to eat like I used to and gain weight" cause, you know, that would just be stupid.  However, I do make excuses and allow more until I find old habits clawing at my taste buds.  Lucky for me I have a band to at least keep the snacks in a small amount and I also have been working hard for months and even when I do snack it is not anything compared to what I used to do.  For example, I ate 2 thin mint cookies Saturday (even though I was not hungry) along with pineapple, apples and cherries.  Six months ago I would have chucked the fruit and ate that whole dang box of thin mints and then wondered why I did not order two boxes, only to remember that I ate the second box the day before.  (that may be a slight exaggeration) Anyways,  I am just amazed at how easy it is to slip back but I am impressed by the fact that I am food savvy enough now to recognize the problem and fix it before I get all crazy.  Here is part of the email that my fill center sent.

Stress and Weight Gain Many people become dependent on food as a way to cope with stress. In some cases it is a behavior developed from infancy. Think about it; babies associate feeling secure and safe with eating. The first love they know and feel come from eating. This is a healthy, normal emotion, but if emotional needs are not met, it can become a problem. As we mature, our unmet emotional needs often result in stress. Much too often we try and fill this void with food. Unfortunately many of us are stressed without realizing it or without knowing what it is causing it. Before we know it we fall into a cycle of emotional eating. The more stressed we become, the more we eat (graze) to alleviate whatever it is that is stressing us. Physical Stress Adding to the mental stress we encounter is the physical stress that can also contribute to weight gain. With today’s hectic schedule most of us do not receive the rest we need to rejuvenate our bodies. When the body becomes physically stressed it releases elevated levels of the hormone cortisol. Cortisol regulates our blood sugar and appetite ultimately leading to hunger, which makes it difficult to follow a weight loss plan, even with the band. When we don’t get sufficient sleep we experience a constant need to reach for something that will “pick us up”. As a banded patient you will be tempted to graze. Any time your body is depleted of energy it will result in fatigue and stress. Both of these elements ultimately can lead to weight gain. We all know how very hard it is to eliminate stress in our lives. Most of us try to “gut up” and deal with it. But with the paramount commitment you made to be banded you have too much at stake to let the stress/eating cycle sabotage your weight loss efforts. What can you do? First; ask yourself if this is a factor affecting your weight loss. If so; address it and research ways you can control physical and mental stress Learn to recognize your stress signals Experiment with positive techniques to deal with stress Talk to your family and friends and ask for help in recognizing and controlling your stress Find ways to re-channel your thought patterns and find substitutions for comfort foods Get the rest your body requires If you feel you need professional help, seek it! Ensure your band is adjusted properly that it might assist you in your efforts (remember you chose to get the band so it can assist you with hunger challenges) The battle you have undertaken to meet your weight loss goals are difficult enough without the added components brought on by stress. By breaking the stress/eating cycle you could see major improvement in your weight loss goals.

- Week

293.4

I guess I am the living proof of slowly but surely.  I will go a few weeks and not lose anything and then I will lose 2 lbs and then hold steady again.  You know what though?  At least I am moving downwards.  Just like I need to stop and catch my breath sometimes while chasing my kids  exercising, my body, I guess, needs the same breaks on this long trek downhill.  I am trying so hard to keep positive about how slowly I am losing the weight and it helps that I have such a great support group in real life and on the blogs as well.  My goal was to be 290 today but I will take the 293 because it beats 350 any day.  I am now shooting for 290 in two weeks.  Wish me luck!

Week in Evaluation

1.  Water- I have so been rocking this!  That might also explain the 2 lbs loss.  Go figure!  I have been drinking 48 oz over my 8 hour work day and then the last 10-20 during the evening.  I really hope I manage to keep this up and can use basic physics (water erosion) to kick the fat out.

2.  Food- I am doing pretty well on eating.  I mean I am PMS and have partaken of an occasional (daily) treat to help with the cravings.  This is all part of my new lifestyle though.  I will allow treats and cheats as long as they don't become a norm.  I mean, who wants to sign on to a life with zero carbs and chocolate?  Not me, but I can sign on to a life with fewer carbs and chocolate and still feel great.  Plus it helps me appreciate it more when I am able to eat it. 

3.  Exercise-  I hurt my knee this week while doing the run/walk thing and I am now in a brace.  I know it is because I am still kind of too heavy to really run and to be honest I have no idea what kind of form is needed for running.  I have been doing some research and one of the Young Women that I teach at church is going to give me some pointers and show me some stretches too.  I am still lifting weights and going to keep walking too. 

The OCC, where I had the surgery, sends an email once a month with a survey about what is going on in my life and my body and one of the questions is if I am happy with my lose so far.  Even though I am losing slowly I have to mark yes because with the surgery I was unable to lose weight no matter what I did and now I am finally able to watch my life change.  How can I not be happy with those kinds of blessings no matter how small they are.  BTW, Please remind me of this statement next time it is a gain week.

~Fat Girl